This article originally appeared on AlterNet. Louis CK has a bit on how men complain about women's "neediness" after sex:. The man just wants to lay there and be cool and the woman wants to cuddle. You did absolutely nothing. Her pussy is on fire because it's gone unfucked completely. This is bullshit!! Louis says it's because men are "bad at sex. But many others are dutifully following the sexual script laid out by pretty much every book, movie, and porn ever made.
That is: hetero man penetrates woman, thrust thrust thrust, woman groans ecstatically, everyone has a orgasm. The thing is, that's not how most woman's bodies work. For the record: most women come from having their clitorises rubbed. Yes, there are a lucky few very few! A skit on how to enhance common sexual scenarios, for example, shows a woman joylessly humping away atop her man.
No vaginal orgasms have ever been recorded in a lab. This isn't because science labs are unsexy even though they are. Women have been coming in labs since Masters and Johnson, when the stigma was presumably even greater. The vagina is so bereft of nerve endings that some vaginal surgeries can be performed without anesthesia. This, perhaps, is the reason that the Gentleman's Cervical Swab Rubbing Courtship Technique of has fallen out of favor. Sex-ed classes' focus on reproduction, pregnancy prevention and abstinence gives kids a lot of information about intercourse, but little on disease-and pregnancy-free options like mutual masturbation.
Of the following three methods: women have their strongest orgasms by their own hand, second strongest by someone else's hand, and weakest via a thrusting dude and the frustratingly indirect stimulation of his penis rubbing-near-but-not-quite-exactly-where-you-need-it. This is according to Masters and Johnson's Human Sexual Response, meaning we've known, and largely ignored this since Most women come as quickly as easily as men, given the right stimulation.
Of course, all women are different, and there are a small number who report that they can orgasm—at least sometimes—via banging alone, and their personal experience should not be discredited. Each woman is dealing the best they can with this actually quite ridiculous dichotomy between what should be and what is. And we might, you know, take note of this. This hypothetical group of women who have this rare reaction to intercourse that has never been recorded in a scientific study is what every other woman is supposed to strive for.
These are the types of unattainable goals women are left with. Is there any wonder why women's sexuality suffers in this kind of environment? Though the film has already won several awards, some film festivals won't run it because it's "too explicit.
It's about biology and the history of how society views women's sexual pleasure and how women can best have an orgasm. It's educational, for fuck's sake literally. And besides, even if it was porn, these are friggin' film festivals. When the heck did film festivals get all uptight? For the record, no one has complained about explicitness. Those women love the shit out of it, and are quick to get friends to watch it. People need to know how women's bodies work—this is important, big stuff!
Every woman needs to know that she is perfectly normal and not somehow broken sexually. It eliminates the need for women to fake their orgasms to soothe partners' egos. And it gives women the freedom to work with the way their bodies actually work—to come as they are, so to speak--so they can start enjoying easy orgasms with a partner. Profile Go Ad-Free Logout. The simple "secret" to making a woman orgasm no one understands A fun new documentary offers a refreshingly straightforward solution to one of the bedroom's most vexing mysteries Related Topics Alternet Louis C.
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